Military版 - "Why did the chicken cross the road?" (转载) |
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n*****k
发帖数: 123 | 1 【 以下文字转载自 Joke 讨论区 】
发信人: nethook (沉迷网事), 信区: Joke
标 题: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Tue Mar 29 20:52:27 2011, 美东)
转自Yahoo.
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"
SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because gosh-darn it, he's a
maverick!
JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he
recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the
chickens on the other side of the road.
HILLARY: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken
to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure
right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it
deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not.
The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground
here.
DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your
definition of chicken?
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now
against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the
chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black
chickens.
DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize
that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before
it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to
do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his
current problems before adding new problems.
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is
why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken
learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm
going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across
the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can
see it in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was
going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs
when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
insider information.
DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been
told.
JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the
plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends,
that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay
too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination
that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like
'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as
plain and as simple as that.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming
story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to
accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.
JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
together, in peace.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2010, which will not only cross
roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2010.
This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road
move beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road with guns because it was time
for change! The chicken wanted change! | s**********d
发帖数: 36899 | 2 STEVE JOBS: the chicken crossing iRoad is a feature, not bug. | n*****k
发帖数: 123 | 3
LOL
【在 s**********d 的大作中提到】
: STEVE JOBS: the chicken crossing iRoad is a feature, not bug.
| n*****k
发帖数: 123 | 4
ERIC SCHMIDT: The chicken crossing the road because it is OPEN
【在 s**********d 的大作中提到】
: STEVE JOBS: the chicken crossing iRoad is a feature, not bug.
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